‘Egham are just getting shouted at’ – a 9-year-olds view of the beautiful game

Luca Calvert-Brydges and Nick Calvert. Photo supplied by Nick.
Luca Calvert-Brydges and Nick Calvert. Photo supplied by Nick.

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On Saturday, Bracknell Town supporter of long-standing Nick Calvert headed off to Egham Town vs Molesey. The Robins were away at Hertford Town and due to prior commitments Nick wasn’t able to head round the M25.

Nick – also a radio reporter and occasional commentator on Hospital Radio Wey – went along with his grandson Luca (pictured with Nick) to the game at the Runnymede Stadium and was ready to report.

We’ll let Nick take up the story..

Essentially I headed off to watch Egham Town v Molesey on Saturday 23rd February 2019 in the misapprehension that I was the main protagonist in our partnership.

I would be taking down all the notes and phoning in the reports whilst my 9-year-old grandson Luca would be using his technological know how to monitor Twitter to keep me updated with scores from the other Isthmian South Central matches. How wrong was I, because it seems that I was usurped!

When it became apparent that the network wasn’t going to allow Luca to monitor Twitter I took on that role as well happy in the knowledge that I had it all covered.

It was only after 10 minutes that I looked to my left to see Luca tapping away on his mobile. I was so ready to reprimand him for playing a game of some description that I was totally taken aback by the fact that he was writing his own report of what was happening before us on the field of play.

Without any suggestion from me he had taken it upon himself to do so, and I have to say that I felt quite a sense of pride that he was doing this.

Below is the result of what he wrote (which I have assisted on by simply correcting any spelling errors, and adding punctuation etc) and the youthful simplicity with journalistic phrases that I never use is quite stunning.

Luckily for everyone’s sake he has refrained from including the constant swear words which were being banded about within distance of his young ears.

Maybe I had better brush up my twitter skills, as I may well find myself in that role for next weekend.

Here, in full is Luca’s report from Egham Town vs Molesey:

Start 14:59: Lots of hassle from both sides as both sides are likely to go down a league.

An early shot from Marley Hamilton but just drifted past the post.

Great offence from Antonio Edilson but no one in the box even so it is a corner and Hamilton poked it home for the visitors.

Trying to get it up but off for a throw.

Good battling from both sides but still 1-0 thanks to Hamilton.

There has just been pointless balls from both sides.

Just so nearly 2-0 but not nobody to poke it home.

It just happened again but pointless there so just need their passing to count

Egham are just getting shouted at, although so nearly a goal for Egham there.

Both sides are just fighting for goals. (Now Bracknell are winning 1-0 as well as Molesey)

Just put it over the bar clearance straight to Egham’s keeper.

Egham are lucky to be only losing 1-0 it could be about 5 easily.

Foul for Egham for not a lot but nothing works, looks like it is Molesey’s game.

Ball goes up high but Molesey’s free kick for Egham foul there.

Egham push their chances away and a header just goes wide for Molesey under heavy challenges.

So nearly a goal for Egham put to high corner to make it 1-1 but not quite.

So nearly 2 but flagged offside as Egham’s keeper became a sweeper keeper (2-0 Bracknell)

A yellow card for Reis Stanislaus (Sounds like a good game for Bracknell Town)

Again it could of been 2, but not quite.

It is fun to watch but not this tackle that leads to a foul then a corner which reaches someone but just over the bar so it’s 1-0 Molesey at half-time.

(2-1 now to Bracknell at half-time)

Second half 16:03: It starts with an offside against Egham who are beginning to shimmer … that’s how much they are wanting a goal.

Almost 2 as yet again nearly another goal for Molesey but over.

Egham are actually begging for a goal now, for their supporters and their coach, but it is not their game.

It is a game of rugby now for Bala, they are having a hard time here at home and that is Egham.

It is a foul for Molesey that was a bad tackle it should of been a card,  but no just a little argument between the players and the lino.

It is a one sided game for Molesey and then it is 2-0 Molesey thanks to Hamilton. (3-1 to Bracknell)

So nearly 2-1 but no …. it’s over from tips of fingers.

It is a weird game with the ball just going from left to right.

It is a tough tackle but the free kick wasn’t much but he is a sweeper again.

There are several fouls here.

Egham are going for it so much, but it is like it is just Molesey on the pitch and the ball just went over the bar.

It looks like Molesey will win but you never know.

Egham could still win, but not likely in about 6 mins.

They might get one from this corner, but just went passed the post.

Egham hassling right now.

This is a shot from Egham, but into the keeper’s hands.

Free kick for Egham and it is a goal, but oh it is offside !

So it was Molesey to bring the 3 points home.

I think Hamilton has scored 2 goals for Molesey.

Egham just give up when the ball is near them it is not Egham’s game, and they are giving up and at full time it is 2-0 to Molesey.

(Bracknell win 3-1 against Hertford Town #cmonduds)

Match report written by Luca Calvert-Brydges aged nine years old!

Do you have a budding young match reporter in your midst? We’d love to feature their reports on Football in Bracknell, whether it’s a senior non league game or Sunday League. Drop us a message at editor@footballinbracknell.co.uk

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